In which I tried so hard / to like this file / but in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
In which the Klingons are bad at stress testing, genetic engineering is a fun fad, and Kirk gets buried in his work.
In which several time loops are closed, the Eugenics Wars is one of them, and Kirk avoids all consequences for everything.
In which Kirk faces consequences, yet another giant space monster is headed toward Earth, and time travel is something of a trip.
In which Starfleet is terrible at mission prioritization, three episodes I didn’t particularly like are condensed into one, and a new counter is inaugurated.
In which I contemplate the sensors, Spock preaches the vegetarianism he practices, and James Kirk Doesn’t Care About Cloud People!
In which a bird has a tricorder, a bear is a dog, and time travel paradoxes continue to be loads of fun.
In which I cave to deadline pressure, the most useful invention ever appears for a single franchise and never again, and conspiracy theories are fun.
In which other captains ain’t got shit on Kirk, Spock has his second First Time, and Vulcans are Space Elves.
In which I spend a lot of time not watching the movie, Starfleet Security must be worth something now, and it looks like a lot of things won’t make it to the end of the film.